diffidentive: has just been one 17 year long episode of "I shouldn't be alive". (shock ✯ I feel like my life)
Shuichi "Beta-est of Betas" Saihara ✯ 最原 終一 ([personal profile] diffidentive) wrote 2019-12-20 11:13 pm (UTC)

[What does he say?]

[What does he say?]


.....

[Nothing. He says nothing. Because Shuichi has no idea WHAT to say to that. That smile is so very genuine, so completely unlike the shit-eating grins, mischievous smirks, and twisted crescent-shape insanities that he's used to seeing from Kokichi that he can tell this ISN'T a lie. He's not teasing or joking...Kokichi Oma is truly and genuinely asking him, Shuichi Saihara, out on a date. Kokichi Oma likes him, Shuichi Saihara, as more than just a friend]

[And acknowledging that suddenly casts a very different light on all Kokichi's previous romantic advances. All the ones that he'd completely misunderstood or written off as teasing jests. A light that throws two things into very sharp relief.]

[One: that Kokichi has very likely had these feelings for months now.]

[And two: Shuichi feel the same way. Save for that one time on the train in Wonderland (and had those feelings even truly been his own, or were they a product of the environment?), he hasn't once thought of Kokichi as more than a friend. And even that he had been fairly certain was just a one-sided thing. Again, because of Kokichi's nature as a liar. It's very hard to know for certain what he's thinking or how he's feeling.]

[And so, Shuichi says nothing. He just stares in blank shock at Kokichi, feeling a weird disconnect between body and mind as he tries to process all the thoughts and feelings going through his head right now. Because good lord there is just so much to unpack here. On top of all his initial thoughts, there's also the fact that they're both guys? Not to mention the entire complicated affair that is Kaede Akamatsu and the feelings he'd once had for her. How he'd had to give up on those feelings without ever giving voice to them. How bad he'd felt when he'd realized that she didn't feel the same way about him. He doesn't want to make Kokichi feel that way...but wouldn't pretending be even more cruel?]


I...u-uhm...

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