[Shuichi's able to get a hand, though the most Kokichi is doing is letting him hold it. He doesn't pull away or anything, but his hand is practically limp in the detective's, trembling and shaking some along with the rest of him as he cries.
But he still seems to be listening at least, because once Shuichi is done talking he starts making an attempt - slowly but surely - to stop that crying. It's certainly not immediate, but it doesn't take terribly long either as he gives what the other boy says some thought.
Just...thinking of the videos on their own, focusing on them and how real they could be made it hard to convince himself otherwise. But...Shuichi was right. The other motives...all of them were lies. And when he compares that video with those...yes it was convincing, but... Eventually he manages to quiet himself to just silent tears and stray hiccups. His fingers tighten just a little on Shuichi's hand, and he unfurls just enough to use his other hand to wipe at his face, giving a little nod. Yeah...yeah. The videos...those had to be lies too, in one way or another. No matter...how they fabricated it, that's what it had to be. A fabrication.]
...I've...I've been having nightmares. That's...the main reason my sleeping has been so awful. That's what you want to know...nightmares about them dying, or being tortured, or...or seeing what I did and falling apart because of it. I've been having nightmares about the killing game, too, about everyone else, about my death, about all of it and...
[He takes a deep breath, letting it out slowly as his grip becomes much, much stronger suddenly, though his hand is still shaking.]
And something...did happen. I made a mistake, and got myself hurt. I have nightmares about that, too.
[He needs time to actually process the info about the videos...not that he doubts him at all. If Shuichi is telling him...
Even if it's a lie, if he's telling him then he can believe it. But he still needs time to actually process it, so he's putting the DICE conversation on hold. If he doesn't, he'll never be able to get anything else out, and he feels bad that the detective is worrying about him like this.]
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But he still seems to be listening at least, because once Shuichi is done talking he starts making an attempt - slowly but surely - to stop that crying. It's certainly not immediate, but it doesn't take terribly long either as he gives what the other boy says some thought.
Just...thinking of the videos on their own, focusing on them and how real they could be made it hard to convince himself otherwise. But...Shuichi was right. The other motives...all of them were lies. And when he compares that video with those...yes it was convincing, but... Eventually he manages to quiet himself to just silent tears and stray hiccups. His fingers tighten just a little on Shuichi's hand, and he unfurls just enough to use his other hand to wipe at his face, giving a little nod. Yeah...yeah. The videos...those had to be lies too, in one way or another. No matter...how they fabricated it, that's what it had to be. A fabrication.]
...I've...I've been having nightmares. That's...the main reason my sleeping has been so awful. That's what you want to know...nightmares about them dying, or being tortured, or...or seeing what I did and falling apart because of it. I've been having nightmares about the killing game, too, about everyone else, about my death, about all of it and...
[He takes a deep breath, letting it out slowly as his grip becomes much, much stronger suddenly, though his hand is still shaking.]
And something...did happen. I made a mistake, and got myself hurt. I have nightmares about that, too.
[He needs time to actually process the info about the videos...not that he doubts him at all. If Shuichi is telling him...
Even if it's a lie, if he's telling him then he can believe it. But he still needs time to actually process it, so he's putting the DICE conversation on hold. If he doesn't, he'll never be able to get anything else out, and he feels bad that the detective is worrying about him like this.]