What? No! [He puts his hands up in front of him in a sort of half distressed, half placating gesture.][He shifts a little on the bed so that he can face Kaede more properly now that she's moved to a different part of the room.]
He...he's been covering it up really well, trying to hide it from us but...he's miserable, Akamatsu-san. For starters: he's still carrying a lot of guilt about the killing game. Apparently, he's been having nightmares...ones bad enough to keep him from sleeping. I don't think he's had a decent night's sleep in weeks...he looked like a ghost when I went over there. Though I'm sure he'll have covered it all up by the time he comes over here.
[So...you know. Maybe don't mention that when he comes over here. You totally didn't hear any of this from Shuichi.]
And then on top of that...he's not enjoying this game any more than he did the killing game. All that talk about how easy he thinks it is and how he's not bothered about playing with strangers...that was all a lie. He's not having fun at all, even if he plays with people he actually likes.
He's...really lonely, Akamatsu-san. More than anything, he's just really lonely. And a game like "kink bingo" just makes that worse, you know?
[Because it's all about sex. About being intimate with others. The very opposite of being alone.]
Honestly, between all the residual guilt over the killing game, fear for the well-being of his subordinates, and everything that's happened to him here...I'm surprised he didn't crack before now.
[Well... at least what happened last night wasn't the direct cause for his breakdown, but now she just feels guilty for other reasons. Her shoulders hunch, just slightly, at the mention of nightmares; of course he'd have those. She still has them, and she hadn't gone through nearly as much as Kokichi had. Hell, she's still envious of how Shuichi can seem to sleep through every night without waking up. So she'd just assumed... it was just her. She had no reason to think Kokichi might be suffering, too, but maybe she should have.
That's what a friend would do, isn't it? See through the lies and help him? Instead she'd been so focused on Shuichi, on making the most of every day on this station and trying to forget the killing game, that she'd failed to look deeper, try to look past his lies.]
He seemed like... he was having a lot of fun.
[She sits down on the bed, eyes unfocused as she stares at the wall straight ahead. Honestly, she's replaying some of what happened last night, trying to think if there were any hints. But neither of them were acting like themselves, then, so how was she to know?]
If he doesn't want to play, then... we can play for him, right? What if we all moved in together? That would save money, and he'd be less lonely if he could bother us all the time.
[Me and you and your friend Steve, more like. But it's easier to propose moving in with Shuichi, which she's wanted to do for a while now, if she's suggesting it be all three of them.]
Yeah, well...he seemed like he was having a lot of fun during the killing game too. Lying is like breathing for him, Akamatsu-san. The only reason I got as much out of him as I did is because he's exhausted...it was much easier to catch him in his lies than it normally is.
[You should have heard them, Kaede. Most of them were so bad. So...very very bad. Shuichi sighs.]
I don't know about all of us moving in together. I mean...I'd be okay with that, [Especially since Kaede already seems to basically live here anyway.] but I'm not sure if that would just...make him feel more lonely. I think he might be a little jealous of what we have. But we can talk about that later.
I did tell him I'd play for him, though, and he accepted that, at least on a temporary basis. So we'll see, I guess.
[She can't say she isn't a little disappointed that he didn't agree immediately, but he's right. If Kokichi really is jealous, it might be worse to see them together all the time... hm. Tricky.
She can't help but huff a quiet laugh through her nose, though, leaning forward to rest her chin in her hands and give him a smile.]
I guess we'll have to really start focusing on our squares then, huh, Saihara-kun? If he still wants a secret base and all that...
[And she winks at him, trying to lighten the mood at least a little before Kokichi gets here. Whenever you're ready, boyo.]
[Hey, he never said he was opposed to just moving in with you. Just that maybe a me and you and your friend Steve situation might not be a good idea.]
[Shuichi's cheeks turn faintly pink, but he laughs quietly too.]
I guess so...I forgot about the secret base. Maybe I should have been more specific when I said "support".
[It's a joke, obviously. Kokichi clearly doesn't expect that out of him, and he knows it. Since the other boy said he wouldn't make him support him forever. But the mood could definitely use some lightening.]
Oh, hey...don't tell him I told you all of this. Not yet, anyway. Just focus on what happened last night, for now. He feels guilty enough about that without even touching everything else that's bothering him.
[Shuichi is pretty sure he might strangle him if he has to have the same conversation with Kaede. He was presumably not supposed to tell her any of the stuff he just did but...look, she needed some context.]
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diffidentive) wrote2017-11-13 11:58 am
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He...he's been covering it up really well, trying to hide it from us but...he's miserable, Akamatsu-san. For starters: he's still carrying a lot of guilt about the killing game. Apparently, he's been having nightmares...ones bad enough to keep him from sleeping. I don't think he's had a decent night's sleep in weeks...he looked like a ghost when I went over there. Though I'm sure he'll have covered it all up by the time he comes over here.
[So...you know. Maybe don't mention that when he comes over here. You totally didn't hear any of this from Shuichi.]
And then on top of that...he's not enjoying this game any more than he did the killing game. All that talk about how easy he thinks it is and how he's not bothered about playing with strangers...that was all a lie. He's not having fun at all, even if he plays with people he actually likes.
He's...really lonely, Akamatsu-san. More than anything, he's just really lonely. And a game like "kink bingo" just makes that worse, you know?
[Because it's all about sex. About being intimate with others. The very opposite of being alone.]
Honestly, between all the residual guilt over the killing game, fear for the well-being of his subordinates, and everything that's happened to him here...I'm surprised he didn't crack before now.
no subject
That's what a friend would do, isn't it? See through the lies and help him? Instead she'd been so focused on Shuichi, on making the most of every day on this station and trying to forget the killing game, that she'd failed to look deeper, try to look past his lies.]
He seemed like... he was having a lot of fun.
[She sits down on the bed, eyes unfocused as she stares at the wall straight ahead. Honestly, she's replaying some of what happened last night, trying to think if there were any hints. But neither of them were acting like themselves, then, so how was she to know?]
If he doesn't want to play, then... we can play for him, right? What if we all moved in together? That would save money, and he'd be less lonely if he could bother us all the time.
[Me and you and your friend Steve, more like. But it's easier to propose moving in with Shuichi, which she's wanted to do for a while now, if she's suggesting it be all three of them.]
no subject
[You should have heard them, Kaede. Most of them were so bad. So...very very bad. Shuichi sighs.]
I don't know about all of us moving in together. I mean...I'd be okay with that, [Especially since Kaede already seems to basically live here anyway.] but I'm not sure if that would just...make him feel more lonely. I think he might be a little jealous of what we have. But we can talk about that later.
I did tell him I'd play for him, though, and he accepted that, at least on a temporary basis. So we'll see, I guess.
no subject
[She can't say she isn't a little disappointed that he didn't agree immediately, but he's right. If Kokichi really is jealous, it might be worse to see them together all the time... hm. Tricky.
She can't help but huff a quiet laugh through her nose, though, leaning forward to rest her chin in her hands and give him a smile.]
I guess we'll have to really start focusing on our squares then, huh, Saihara-kun? If he still wants a secret base and all that...
[And she winks at him, trying to lighten the mood at least a little before Kokichi gets here. Whenever you're ready, boyo.]
no subject
[Shuichi's cheeks turn faintly pink, but he laughs quietly too.]
I guess so...I forgot about the secret base. Maybe I should have been more specific when I said "support".
[It's a joke, obviously. Kokichi clearly doesn't expect that out of him, and he knows it. Since the other boy said he wouldn't make him support him forever. But the mood could definitely use some lightening.]
Oh, hey...don't tell him I told you all of this. Not yet, anyway. Just focus on what happened last night, for now. He feels guilty enough about that without even touching everything else that's bothering him.
[Shuichi is pretty sure he might strangle him if he has to have the same conversation with Kaede. He was presumably not supposed to tell her any of the stuff he just did but...look, she needed some context.]